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Dr. Alena arrives for a tutoring appointment with impeccable credentials — Harvard, Yale, a stint abroad, a brief visit to the moon, and the patent on a shrinking spray she invented herself. The student is skeptical. This is the last significant mistake the student makes.

Within minutes of arrival, one rude comment too many triggers a chemistry demonstration nobody signed up for. The spray works exactly as advertised. What follows is a very efficient lesson in why you don't c*ll a doctor with a shrinking device a nerd to her face.

Alena works through three students over the course of the video, each getting a personalized curriculum:

Student One gets the full introductory course — skepticism, shrinkage, a brief negotiation over which toe finishes the job, and then a very thorough sole massage. Alena remarks that she feels like she just moisturized.

Student Two survives the foot situation only to be used as a couch cushion for an applied physics lesson on gravity, presure, and body weight. They get the left cheek. That becomes their permanent address.

Student Three was hiding in the bathroom and thought that might help. It did not. They receive the biology module, which Alena delivers with genuine enthusiasm and zero remorse, before wrapping things up when she gets bored.

With the door locked and the house now hers alone, Alena settles in with some snacks, reflects fondly on her teaching methodology, and wonders aloud whether she should post another ad. She gave lessons in chemistry, biology, and physics to three students in ten minutes.

She really is an excellent tutor.

Filmed with walking threw the body transitions

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