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Customer's script:

The scene begins with Tweety working at a computer. Tweety is your co-worker and lover. She is clothed in workout attire. Her shirt shows some clevage. She is eating a grape when suddenly she begins to ch*ke. You immediately get behind her as Tweety is motioning she is ch*king. Untucking her shirt you interlock your hands above her navel and begin hemlich manuver thrusts. You give her 10 upward thrusts when she, suddenly, goes heavy in your arms. Her eyes are fixed open with her mouth opened and tongue sticking out. She is for all intents and purposes lifeless. Realizing the seriousness of the situation you realize you must get Tweety to another room for medical attention. You craddle carry her into the other room. Please have her shoes off as she is carried . Once in the adajcent room you lay Tweety 's lifeless body flat on her back. Her feet are shoulder width apart, and her arms are fully spread open. You untuck her shirt and pull her pants down slightly to better access her abdomen. You straddle her and begin to do 10 abdominal thursts with your hands interlolcked above her navel pressing upward to her chest. Tweety 's body shakes. Still nothing. You check for pulse and breathing. You exclaim loudly "No pulse no breath Tweety, I need to begin CPR" Tilting Tweety's lifeless head back with her eyes fixed open you pinch her nose open her mouth and bl*w 3 full real mouth to mouth breaths into her lifeless mouth and lungs. Her cheeks violently puff out and her chest arches off the ground. Please do real MTM to her. I would like the MTM exchange between you two to be audible. I would like to hear the air go into and expel from Tweety's body. With your hands and fingers interlocked inbetween Tweety's breasts you do 15 hard chest compressions that cause belly movement upward. You repeat 3 breaths and 10 compressions. Each compression is slow and counted off. After the third inital cycle of CPR, you also pull her pants down to her knees. Again you begin 3 breaths on Tweety followed by 10 compressions on her now hot body. You can not help but become horny and start to jam your tongue into Tweety 's mouth during the resus. She is c*mpletely lifeless. You continue with 3 breaths and 10 compressions. After several cycles of no success you try other lifesaving measures. Instead on mouth to mouth you do "mouth to nose" on Tweety. You tilt her head back close her mouth, cover her nose and bl*w 10 breaths into it since she has an obstruction in her airway. Her eyes still open her chest rises. You then stradle her again and do 10 abdominal thrusts. After the last thrust you turn her to her side to see if the object has been expelled. It has! You remove the object from her mouth and lay her back on her back . You exclaim "Still pulseless and breathless, restarting CPR, come on Tweety!" You go back to traditional MTM on Tweety. Her head is fully tilted back with her eyes fixed open. 3 slow full breaths are given to her with some tongue jamming. 10 hard compressions on her lifeless chest are followed which cause significant belly movement. You continue the resus on Tweety which is 3 MTM breaths and 10 compressions. You beg Tweety to wake up. You check her after several cycles and state aloud" Still no pulse, continuing CPR, come on Tweety wake up!". You continue CPR for several more minutes with tonguing and pounding chest compressions. Finally Tweety begins to cough and awakens. As you help her up you explain to her you had to give her CPR.

CPR Makes Me Horny