Princess Mabel!

Listen up loser! College is so important, and I know you think it's necessary to send your offspring to college, but isn't it just as important to give your money to me? Isn't it also necessary in your life to pay me and help send me to college? Huh? And let me tell you something, I have a very high IQ and I can guarantee that I'm smarter than you and your offspring and I will be of way more use to society than they could ever hope to be. Why do you want to send your offspring to college, huh? Do you know what they're going to grow up to be? They're not going to be anyone of importance. Do you know what they're going to be? They're going to be degenerate losers just like their step-father

So come on, why keep putting money into their college fund? Why put so much money into a savings account that you can't touch? It's your money after all, you're the one that worked so hard to earn it. And what are you doing with it? You're throwing it away in some bank account for your st*pid *ss offspring. They don't even appreciate it. They don't even thank you or give you anything in return for saving up all that cash. Your offspring suck! F*ck your offspring!

I know you've thought about dipping into that college fund. I know you've thought about how easy it would be to just withdraw a couple of grand and just use it to tribute me. I know you've thought about it. I'm way more intelligent than your offspring will ever be and I'm beautiful and I know how to mindfuck you out of your cash lol. You know I'm worth it. I'm way more worthy of your money than your st*pid f*cking offspring. And I know it makes you so horny to give me your money, doesn't it? It's so much more rewarding than saving it all up in a st*pid bank account for your offspring someday.

Go on, take it out for me, you know you want to. You know you want to withdraw a couple grand from that college fund and just give it all to me, to be in my greedy hands. I'm in college too you know and why should I pay for it when I have losers like you who can't stop paying me would give you such a rush to just give it all to me. I know you can't resist me. I bring you more joy than your st*pid offspring ever have. Go on and dip into that college fund. In fact, take it all out and give it all to me. It's either theirs, or mine, and I think you know very clearly that it's my college fund now

You're a weak, pathetic excuse for a human being. And I know you can't resist giving in to my bratty greed, can you? I'm too much for you to resist, you need to give me everything. And I really do want it all. You love making my life better. You'll do anything just to be a small part of my life, and you love being useful to me. Well guess what? You can be all those things, you can contribute to my education and make my life so much easier. F*ck your offspring. F*ck em! Give me their college fund. I deserve it. I'm smart and sexy and manipulative and you can't f*cking resist me.

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